If you see me post, I'm awake. If you don't see me post, then I'm probably still awake. If I say "I'm going to go to sleep" I'm lying.
I'm Hannibal Lecter (But not really), 17, England.
I post stuff. I think I'm far enough into my blog for you to be able to look around and see if you like, or dislike, the things I post.
Feel free to follow me, but it's okay if you don't, I'd rather my follower count to be lower. Followers are too mainstream for me ;)
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
Scratch that, I guess it’s about equal.
It’s like ugh what am I doing with my life? Just stop, please, you’re ruining everything that could be and everything that is and everything that isn’t and just deepsigh everything.
Okay, something a little more coherent, I hope; There’s so much that I do that I dislike and so much that I want to do that I’m not doing and as much as I’m trying to, the things that I want to stop aren’t stopping and the things that I want to start aren’t starting. I’ve been making my way through life by making my own path with the chances that I give myself and making the best of the chances that others give but with these things that I want to stop/start, they’re not opportunities to take or paths to choose, they’re changes that I need to make to old routes I’ve taken and it feels like it’s out of my control, and it’s just so… I don’t know.
I don’t want people to hate me, and more so, I don’t want to hate myself, but gradually it’s happening because of those things and the way things are panning out. It’s not like I’m asking for perfection while I’m at the bottom of the pit, all I want is to not be someone that I’m so annoyed at because I’m the only one that I’m annoyed at and that’s not because I’m a self-loathing person, I’m just an everybody-else-loving person, and it’s like, the worst thing, I mean why don’t I like myself as much as I like everybody else? Well, I know why, but why am I not changing? I don’t know, I’ve gone off on a tangent. I’ll just leave you with an incomplete rageself post and hope to high heaven that nobody cares enough to read this far.
